Whatever you do, Don't Die Wondering

Whatever you do, Don’t die wondering…..

“Yesterday is History

Tomorrow is a Mystery

Today is a Gift, that’s why we call it The Present”

I would love to be able to tell people I thought up these words, but alas no.  It was initiated by a man called Bil Keane, an American Cartoonist notable for his work on the long running newspaper comic “The Family Circus”. 
However, it pretty much sums up how I try to live my life.  This hasn’t always been so unfortunately.  Maybe it’s true that with age comes wisdom.  Until some clever person works out how to travel through time, we only have the present.  So why do we spend so much of our lives wanting to be either in the future or in the past. 

When we are young, we want to grow up.  God knows why, because when we do grow up it’s not that great anyway.  We fritter away our carefree school days wishing we were older so we can
Be independent i.e. not answerable to our parents
Be free (well that’s a joke.  We all learn freedom creates its own problems)
Go to work (whose bright idea was that?)

Okay, so now we are adults and we mess it all up by wanting a career, getting married and having children.  So we get ourselves totally bogged down with mortgages, children and day to day responsibilities.  We spend twenty or so years on a treadmill thinking that once the mortgage is paid and the children are off our hands we will be free (is that again or for the first time?).  And then the old codger we live with decides to have a midlife crisis and run off with the secretary!  Honestly!  So suddenly, we are free (again?).  I don’t know about anyone else but all this freedom terrified me for quite a long time.  All those years ago (in the playground) no one told me that with freedom comes responsibility, at the very least, to yourself.

What they don’t tell you is that once you have children you will never be free again.  Don’t get me wrong – this is not a bad thing.  In fact, it’s the best thing that can happen to a woman because with children, they grow up and they (eventually) give you grandchildren and that’s where I learned to live in the moment.  Grandchildren are all care and no responsibility. 

My grandparents gave me 100% undiluted unconditional love.  That’s not to say my parents didn’t, but parents can’t just drop everything to roll down a hill, go to the swings, catch a train, ferry or bus for the experience of it, or any of the myriad of spontaneous things we do with our grandchildren.  My grandmother used to make me pancakes whenever I asked.

When my grandchildren are with me, I don’t have the time or inclination for anything else.  I am totally involved with them and I love it.  This is what living in the moment is all about for me.  Buying endless Swan Plants so they can see a Monarch Butterfly come out of its Cocoon, seeing the wonder on their faces when the popcorn starts popping in the pan or the way baking soda foams up when you put it into the hot milk.  Simple pleasures that I wouldn’t swop for all the fame and fortune in the world.

I’ve done lots of things in my life, some of them I’m not particularly proud of, but I decided a long time ago not to die wondering and I won’t. 

So the next time you find yourself wishing you were younger, older, richer, prettier, thinner, whatever, remember that lovely quote by Bil Keane and be happy that you are who you are and where you are.  If you would rather be somewhere else that fate is in your hands too.  As my mother used to say to me “For heaven’s sake Geraldine, just get on with it!”  So I did and here I am, older and wiser and happy in the moment.