Confessions of a Disordered Eater

Confessions of a Disordered Eater

I've never had a comfortable or healthy relationship with food.  There I've said it.  However, I've never had a diagnosable eating disorder either.  I've never been seriously overweight or underweight for that matter.  I've never been more than 10 kgs above my ideal weight, but I am definitely a disordered eater and have been all my life. I've flirted with every quick weight loss programme ever invented, i.e. The Israeli Diet, The Atkins Diet (the first one in the 70's) The Grapefruit Diet, various detoxes and Sureslim.  I'm sure there have been more but I just can't remember what they were.  Admittedly, Sureslim worked and it was a healthy eating weight loss plan.  Jenny Craig and Weightwatchers have never been on my radar, but I know they work for other people so I'm not bagging them. 

Raewyn and I did Sureslim about five years ago and it taught me to eat sensibly, but there is still that little voice in my head saying "have a piece of chocolate, have a scone with that coffee, have some ice cream after dinner".  Nothing wrong with any of those things, but if I start I don't stop at one piece of chocolate and then I hate myself.  So what's all that about? 

What is this thing in womens' psyche that makes us obsessive about weight?  I don't believe the adage "fat and happy". I guarantee Dawn French would love to be willowy.  I do admire her ability to laugh at her obesity however and she makes a living from it, so good on her! 

My mother was seriously overweight all her life and suffered all the associated health problems such as high blood pressure,high cholesterol (11.8! at one stage), bad knee and hip pain.  Her doctor told her constantly that if she lost weight most of her health problems would lessen or disappear.  In her late 80's she started losing her sight and wasn't able to bake any more.  She was always a wonderful baker and the tins were always full at her place.  Not a green vegetable in sight though.  Anyway, she started losing weight and she liked it so much she couldn't stop either.  In her 80's!  Suddenly we had this anorexic mother/grandmother on our hands.  She went from over 90 kgs to under 60kgs and she loved it.  Her weight has stabilised now at a comfortable 64kgs, thank goodness.  The upside of all this is that her cholesterol and blood pressure are normal and she doesn't have joint pain any more.

If this can happen to someone in their 80's what chance do teenagers have with all their associated peer pressure?

Weekend Food Diary

My lovely partner, Kenny, was out of town this weekend so I decided I would keep a diary of everything I ate and share it with everyone.  So here goes.

Friday
8.00a.am - Breakfast with Raewyn - Organic Bircher Meusli with Berry Compote, 2 flat white coffees.
10.30a.m. - Meeting with work colleague - 1 flat white coffee
1.15p.m. - Lunch - Fish and chips at the office (A rare event and very unsatisfying.  The anticipation was far more appealing than the reality.  Admin girls finished off the leftover chips)
3.00p.m. - another meeting and another flat white coffee (unusual, as I don't like coffee in the afternoon)
7.30p.m. - Dinner - leftover stirfry with a fried egg. (very satisfying) Apple

Saturday
7.00a.m. Breakfast - Fresh fruit, seeds and yoghurt
10.30a.m. - Cheese scone and coffee with Grandson Max
2.30p.m. Almond Croissant (bought at the Farmers Market with Max)
8.30p.m. Dinner - Saved by my friend who invited me to dinner with friends. Roast Chicken, Courgettes and Beans in Pesto, Baked potato and kumera, tomato and capsicum salad. 
Confession, if I hadn't gone to my friend's place, dinner was going to be a problem as there was nothing much to eat in the house. The choice was tinned salmon with salad or a poached egg.  And of course there is always the Hokey Pokey icecream in the freezer.

Sunday
9.00a.m. Breakfast with friend.  Bacon, scrambled eggs and potato rosti. 2 Flat white coffees.
It's now 12.50p.m. and I'm not hungry so will wait for my bloke to come home and cook dinner.  Have fillet steak and salad.

What's the problem you say?  Well breakfast is usually okay but I degenerate throughout the day and where are the greens? Admittedly, when I'm cooking for two we either have green vegetables or salad.  It's when I'm on my own the trouble starts.  Long live Kenny, who thinks eating your greens is a spoon full of peas and a couple of pieces of broccoli if he really has to.