Am I My Former Self

Am I My Former Self

By Foible Gal (Wendy Reichental)

Image by Catharuna via Flickr
S e p t e m b e r, it strikes a nerve with me, I feel my pulse racing with the excitement and buzz of activity that seems to permeate the crisper air. But something else lately gets my pressure elevated and heart pumping, it’s a simple innocuous compliment given to me by a stranger of the opposite sex. My husband could tell me that my hair looks nice and I will not miss a blink, and in fact, his observation won’t even register with me. And I don’t know why, because I want him to still notice me that way….is it because from this phrase, he moves right on to “pass the salt”? I’m not sure, what I do know… is have the new young hottie computer support guy at work send me an email that reads:

From: K.
Sent: Thursday, August 26, 2010 2:33 PM
To: W.

Subject: RE: upgrade available

Thanks for the heads up. u look sooper hawt today

————————————————————–

(- notice smiley face and how young people write these days)…but who cares he’s so dreamy……and have same computer guy compliment my shoes, and I will walk right into a wall! This I’ve determined is how you know you have literally hit mid-life!

In your twenties and thirties, you might come to expect that men will turn their heads at you and if you smile back, you might even get a nod in your general direction or a smiley face put on your bill at a restaurant with the waiter’s name, but somehow in your forties, well, those smiley faces seem less apparent and blurred. The latter having more to do with the fact that in your forties your vision starts to change and most things do start to look rather questionable and obscure. So, I don’t expect much in my 40s, I am just happy to be for the most part healthy. I certainly don’t expect any heads to turn when I walk by, unless it’s because I assume I have a post-it note stuck on my back, or a strand of toilet paper accompanying my shoe!

I certainly do not feel I have the same sense of confidence I did in my younger days. Which is why I was so intrigued when I caught an interview with an author of a book titled; “My Formerly Hot Life” by Stephanie Dolgoff. Dolgoff claims that older women while still able to be hot “step over into this other category of women when you reach a certain age and it’s a different kind of hot. And that took a little while for me to realize” –see Ref 1 Dolgoff’s realization is that there’s a certain kind of comfortable that comes with being older, she remarks further “what I’m saying is that — that adjustment from being treated as a beautiful young woman which young women generally are whether or not they’re — you know, they’re beautiful, step over to the next line to be an older woman. And the world treats you kind of differently. And that can be a little bit of a shock.“ see Ref 1

So I guess I’m in shock that at my current age (48 just not ready to yell it from the roof tops!), I still could get noticed and that my body could still react so viscerally and school girlishly. I just want to hang at this computer guy’s locker and wait for him to give me his class ring and retro school jacket. I completely revert back to feeling like a giddy teen. I have day dreams of spilling my coffee on the keyboard just so my computer guy can come around and reboot my computer, or better yet my libido! So, I ask myself have I accepted that I have “crossed over” like Dolgoff mentions in her book to a “new place in my life” where such sort of flattery is less important and no longer expected, well I’d have to say HELL NO! But I understand the message the author is trying to spread, we need to embrace where we are in our life and cherish and realize where we have been or put in her words “The message not coming across just from the title of the book ”My Formerly Hot Life“ is that life is so much cooler and so much more comfortable and you’re so much more grounded and happy on this side of young.” That might be all very nice and true, but nothing sure beats a lovely compliment and having an impish personality certainly goes a long way at keeping me at least admittedly and satisfyingly delusionally ageless as well!

Woman with Toilet Paper Stuck to Shoe photo
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Read Wendy's other Blog posts and articles about Wendy's choices as one of the 'sandwich' generation.

• When three makes company
• When Lightning Strikes - Nap!
• Caring for kids and parents- tough for those in the middle
• Don't judge a book by it's cover
• Missing...has anyone seen my libido
• Some say changes - I say exchanges

Copyright of these story belongs to the original artist Wendy Reichental, rights to reproduce or use any images may be obtained by contacting the author.http://foiblesandflaws.wordpress.com/when-three-makes-company/